The angel closes her eyes -pale blue colored eyes.
This_Is_Your_Life_Now
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Name: I Don't know whether to


Interests: “i go on hope ... i build a staircase with my faith ... i dream ... this gives me significance ... it makes me feel like someone ... maybe im lying to myself ... maybe im just the same mundane bullshit as everyone else .... just white washed ... a false sense of self ... maybe im destined to fail … tomorrow ... if i die ... will people speak of my kindness ... my honesty ... my smile ... my hugs ... my fucking thumbnail sketches i procrastinated into making paintings ... the guitar riffs that would have made ballads ... the scratched notation and poems that could have filled the canyons ... if i die tomorrow ... will i be proof ... of what not to be ... not to be a waste ... could the impact effect someone ... to dream such as i dreamed ... and struggle to succeed ... i have to show ... what only i know ... what rests in this muscle in my chest ... here ... in this heart ...” ------- //\\//\\ARCUS ------- //\\//\\ATTERN


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AIM: U R Unforgettabl


Member Since: 4/11/2004

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Wednesday, March 30, 2005

Currently Reading
Alice's Adventures in Wonderland and Through the Looking Glass
By Lewis Carroll, John Tenniel
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I almost died camping but I had fun.

Never a good sign when you wake up in the middle of the night to Jeff screaming, "Omigod, I can't feel my toes and where did all this water come from???"

The first night we tried to keep breathing because we had two little blankets and there was snow.

The second night it rained and our tent was leaking. Four inches of rain collecting in the bottom of our tent. All of my clothes were floating.

We're bonded together now. Escaping death with someone connects you...


Friday, February 18, 2005

I keep forgetting about this thing. Busy with moving and school and Charlie (my amazing puppy) and Jeff and everything else.

I have nothing else to say except that I have had an awful week and my hormones are crazy ... but Heffe keeps being sweet to me anyway even tho that is not what I deserve.

(Me at three in the morning:) "Jeff... wake up... Am I crazy? Tell me the truth..."


Wednesday, February 02, 2005

Currently Playing
Facing Future
By Israel "IZ" Kamakawiwo'ole
Somewhere over the Rainbow
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You Are 31 Years Old
31
30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more!
 
Um... had the taste of success and true love???
Whatever.
Punch Jeff in the face if you see him.
He's frustrating me... and taking longer than I would normally perfer to decide what he wants. I have no patience.I'm scared... Doing this again so soon makes me nervous.
Moving today. I miss Cor.


Monday, December 13, 2004

Currently Playing
Smile
By Brian Wilson
You are My Sunshine
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My life is cozy.

That is the only way to describe it. There are so many people that I get to spend endless time with that love me completely and I love them. That makes me smile.

I also don't care too much that few people will respond to this, because thats not really the point of this post.

The point is to say that I am satisfied with things. I have a great job, great family, great friends and get to take trips to the mountains to watch the sun rise. I also am being honest, I think. I will admit that I don't have everything together, I smoke too much and still miss "you know who".

But I am allowing myself to be happy.

And that is life.


Thursday, December 02, 2004

Started my new job and have done nothing but hang out with my new work friends all week. They're fantastic. Seriously.

Like... Rasta Rick with his pretty face and dreads... A.C. MOTHERFUCKIN' Myles (for miles and miles!!!) and his blues band and his crush on me... Jeff with the shaved head... Mike the professional baseball player who likes to feel normal...

There are more... but those are my friends after 3 days.

I have had so much fun so far. I love my new job. And that we hang out and it is so comfortable.

Yay for me and my life.



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Trixie..Life is just a fantasy